rest.

Wake up. Rush because you missed your first alarm and can’t be late. Maybe eat breakfast when you get there if you have time. Don’t forget to run errands after you get off. You have dinner with your friends, so make sure you look nice and you’re in a good mood. Maybe watch some Netflix after or scroll through Instagram if you’re not too tired to the point of falling asleep. Don’t let the stress of that presentation coming up keep you awake. Wake up the next day and do it all over again.

Rush rush rush. Go go go. We live in a culture of never ending busyness, constant distraction, and continual burn out. Work for what you want and if you’re not there, you need to work harder. Taking time for yourself can be considered rude or lazy. This is something that we’ve grown used to. We’ve lost an understanding of the importance of rest. Not just physical rest, but spiritual rest in the lord.

Before my race, I found myself in a continual cycle of going, doing, and burning out. I worked 30 to 35 hours a week, went to college full time, and tried to fit in all other aspects of life on top of it. Even if I was running after good things, it became a toxic pursuit. If I wasn’t physically exhausted, I was emotionally exhausted. If I wasn’t completely burned out, I was making my way there.

When I got here, one of the first things I noticed was how fast I walk. I’m always in a hurry. Always early. Never allowing myself to slow down when I could be going faster. If I’m not physically moving fast my brain is always consumed with thoughts, always going at a speed of what feels like 200 mph. I always think the answer to weariness is napping or sleeping more. For so long I thought I couldn’t sit or rest because that would only cause me to fall more behind, only present the opportunity to become more overwhelmed by my circumstances. I realized that while I had a spirit of constant rush and exhaustion, the Lord was calling me to stop and sit in his presence.

I love how beautifully Martha and Mary illustrate the concept of rest. In Luke 10:38-42, Martha prepares to welcome Jesus into her home. Mary, her sister, was more concerned with sitting at his feet and listening. Martha is so concerned about everything being perfect for him, frustrated that Mary isn’t serving with her. She expresses her stress and frustration to Jesus, asking him to tell Mary to help. But rather than agreeing with her, he says this: “Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has made the right choice, and it will not be taken from her.”

It feels so much more natural to gravitate towards Martha’s character than to be like Mary. So much easier to fuel our energy into tangible results or even good intentions. But Jesus calls us to something greater than striving: striding. He offers us rest in a world that gives us the opposite. He tells us not to worry about the wrong things. And he gives grace when we do.

I’ve heard before that Jesus walked at a speed of about 3 miles per hour. He wasn’t in a rush but he knew where he was going. He stopped and withdrew to rest when he needed to. So, what speed are you walking at? Where are you going? Are you stopping to sit at his feet? I encourage you to walk at his pace and resist the urge to go faster. To set your eyes on him instead of the things of this world. To stride towards him, to lay down the distractions and worries, and to sit at his feet. To be still. To listen and let him say what he wants. To make time for him. To freely receive the rest he gives. I promise it is better than checking off boxes.