“I Remembered”: Foster Care and the Church

Today, as I held a sweet one month old, cocoa skinned, brown eyed, curly haired baby, I remembered you. I remembered how you too had the same beautiful cocoa skin and curly hair, how you too were once held in my arms. I remembered your tiny hands that could barely wrap around my finger, your unique cry, the way you wiggled your little arms and legs like you were dancing, the way you yawned, the way your eyes wandered, the way you’d wake up at 3 am. I remembered how they labeled you as “failure to thrive” yet you got so big. I remembered the withdrawal and the Early Steps testing and all the challenges you had to work through. I remembered how much of a fighter you are. I remembered saying goodbye to you. 

I remembered the rest of you, too. R and D, C, M, J, R and J, M and T, and more. I remembered your sweet faces, the fist bumps, the tantrums, the giggles, all of it. I remembered the goodbyes and how hard they were. I remembered what an honor it was to love on you, even if it was only for a season. 

I don’t know where most of you are today. I don’t know if you’re well fed or hungry, or if you have a place to lay your head, or if there are bruises and scars on your little bodies. And because of that, and so much more, my heart breaks for you. 

While so many have lost hope for you, I haven’t. 

I pray that someone, even if it’s just one person, would hold you and show you the loving arms of Jesus. I pray you would know how loved you are despite the brokenness. I pray the church would rise up and do something; I pray there would be a village for you. I pray you would know how deserving you are of a home. I pray you would be seen as more than just a statistic, that you wouldn’t see yourself as such. I pray you would come to know that you are NOT an orphan because you have a heavenly Father who has adopted you forever- no matter how many houses you find yourself at over the weeks, months, and years, no matter how many people have neglected you. I pray that one day, there wouldn’t be a need for this system, that cycles of generational brokenness would be broken, that you would receive fullness and healing in the Lord. 

May is national foster care month, and I wanted to share my heart on this issue with you. 

Some of the facts (from the National Foster Youth Institute): 

• There are approximately 424,000 children across the country in foster care, with roughly 20,000 aging out each year. In 2017, more than 71,000 children were waiting to be adopted. 

• Approximately one third of children entering the system are people of color, while they only make up 13% of the general population.

• 25% of children in the system will experience the affects of PTSD.

• 60% of sex trafficking victims have histories of being in the child welfare system.

  An infographic on aging out:

I share this not to shame or place blame on anyone, but to show how much room there is for the church to come alongside these people in love. The fact of the matter is, the church has always been called to orphan care. Our hearts should break for what breaks His. I think there is a common misconception that if you can’t foster or adopt, you can’t do anything at all, but there are so many ways to meet the need, from being a Guardian Ad Litem, to financially supporting foster families, giving them your time, and more. I encourage you to ask the Lord if he’s calling you to impact the system in any way, and if so, I would love for you to reach out! 

Foster care is by no means easy, but the way I’ve seen the Lord’s hand in it is something I couldn’t ignore and wouldn’t trade for the world. 

Lord, thank you for breaking my heart for what breaks yours. 

“Pure and undefiled religion before God the Father is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and keep oneself unstained from the Lord.” – James 1:27